If you Give a Kid an Ear Bud

Upon leaving Renee's special time with Grandpa, he bestowed upon her some ear buds. And everyone knows...
If you give a kid some ear buds, she is sure to want an ipod to listen to music with.
If you give a kid your ipod, she will want to upload her own music onto it.
If she has her own music on it, she is sure to want to listen to it all day every day.
If she listens to it all day, her sister is going to be jealous and want an ipod of her very own.
If you give her the other ipod, she will want to put HER own music on it.
If she puts her own music on it SHE will want to listen to it all day.
If both of your children listen to music all day, the ipods will need some charging.
If they plug them in to charge, they will become agitated at waiting and unplug the ipods every 5 minutes to check to see if they are fully charged.
If they unplug it every 5 minutes it will NEVER charge and chiming of the unplugging noise 100,000 times will drive their mom crazy.
If she is driven crazy, she will give in to let them play the kitty game on line to distract them while they wait.
If you let them play the kitty game they will never want to stop.
If they never want to stop playing kitties, you will have to regulate their time online by rationing time on kitties with math games.
If they have to play twice as long on math as they do kitties, they will get burnt out and their brains will become mush at the amount of math they are thinking about and eventually not be able to do even the simplest problems without getting confused at the jumble of numbers before them.
If they become burnt out they will start to cry and their dad will feel sympathy on them and let them just play kitties without rationing any more math.
If they play kitties unlimited they will loose track of time and it will soon be bedtime.
If it is bedtime they will want to find a special place to put their ipods so they know right where to find them when they wake up in the morning.
If they didn't turn off the ipods at night, they will be dead in the morning and need charging again.
If they go to grab them to charge them, they are sure to notice only one is there.
If they notice only one is there there is sure to be a frantic search for the other one.
Once they have looked everywhere they are sure to ask mom what SHE did with it.
If she didn't touch it they are sure to call dad at work and see where HE put it.
If he says he didn't take it they are sure to realize the ipod is forever lost in oblivion and be heartbroken and distraught.
If they are distraught then their brother is sure to say, "I sorry I took your charge."
If he tells them he took the charge they are sure to ask him to tell him where it is.
If he tells them it is in the clothes drawer in his room, they will to want to go and get it.
If they want to go and get it, they will be thwarted by their mother who will inform them that the boy they babysit is still sleeping in the room and they can't go in.
If they are thwarted they will have to come up with a new plan to bide their time and will have to start to talking to each other. Once they start talking to each other it will feel exciting, since there has been silence in the house for two days with plugged in children.
They will start by talking about how happy they are that they now know the location of the lost ipod and give their brother hugs and kisses and lots of attention and praise at being honest and telling them where it was.
If he gets praise and attention, he is sure to be happier that the sadness at the lost ipod is over, but that it has not been recovered yet.
If it is not recovered but everyone is happy they are sure to play together and have fun.
If they are playing together and having fun, then when the boy wakes up and comes down he will want to join in the fun.
He will want to join in the fun they are sure to not even notice that the ipod is still in the drawer and keep playing nicely together.
Once they are all plaing nicely together then the mom is happy and has time to herself.
If she has time to herself, she might try to get on the computer that has been monopolized by kitty games.
If she gets on the computer she is sure to stay on too long, because she has been entertaining an "only child" son for two days since his sisters have been plugged into the computer and ipods.
And since she has been hanging out with her son, she has heard him sat the cutest things and wants to document how funny his is.
If she starts to write all the funny things he says, it will make her happy and  she will want to write about how this great opportunity came about and she will write a ridiculously long post about what happens when you give a kid an ear bud.